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What banal drivel do I have today... none really. The only thing I can think is that there's something about want and the expression of it that is a core issue of how we interact with people. Though there is one thing to say though, sod people and their stupid tedium. |
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Apr. 12th, 2009 @ 03:38 am
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Every once in a while it feels like I can grasp the reason why religion functioned as a good control mechanism for overworked germanic serfs. Then there's the innate understanding of Atlas and his sky holding up jobbie. The fundamental understanding I get right now is that when it all comes down to it, life is a burden. Its a precious one though, one you need to watch and make sure it sorts out. Keep it and the web of relations that come out of it intact and all that junk. But in the end any careless stupidity on your part and your burden could be alleviated.
That is, life without hope is a burden. Hope shows you a nice path towards the end that we all go to on the path blah blah blah. The moral of the story folks is alcohol is at the moment making me depressed which makes me a sad panda. I hate that I'm technically sane and have no medically sound reason to behave like a complete twat. |
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The art/science split with food is troublesome in the regards of professionals (ie dudes on TV) who promote wacky arty statements like "you can see the flavour" or other mystical insane shit like using crystals and meditation to get rid of rats. That kind of obfuscation is really shite. |
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Honestly, history would be much better if it were somehow edible. Then it would be far easier for me to absorb the information. |
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One of the things that we espouse in a western society is the "naturality" of our behavior, which is to say that the best way to act is to somehow be true to some kind of central "core" (or Spark since I'd rather be a Transformer). Its so strange since there are factors that also suggest we need to behave with some social conception of manners and whatever. Thusly we need to be natural within an artificial context...
This seems like utter bullshit.
If manners are a constructed framework in which it is socially acceptable to behave in, then one's persona is also constructed. Since construction is an active act, I should be able to choose how I want to be. I would like to be a cross between all of Hugh Laurie's House and Jeeves and Wooster characters with a touch of early Anthony Bourdain where he was angry and interesting. |
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More writer's block again. This time I'm pretty sure its me blocking myself from getting work done. Running out of time, argh.
Mar. 10th, 2009 @ 12:05 am
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| » American Kitchen Nightmares |
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I couldn't sleep last night so I watched a bunch of American Kitchen Nightmares episodes. Its kinda neat:
1) The format is of course the same through series 2, and what parts of series 1 that I've seen. Decent moral story about family and work and how they shouldn't mix.
2) How the hell did these people get 300k, 500k, 1 mill, 2 mill down in debt? Where did this money come from?
3) It is the stuff of my nightmares, and I kinda like it.
4) British Kitchen Nightmares is much better.
Feb. 24th, 2009 @ 06:13 pm
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| » Confessors rarely ever get laid |
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Hmm, to put it succinctly, "Aargh" While I like being mildly voyeuristic in my experiences I think I've had enough with hearing people's problems. Why can't these goat faced idiots provide me with some writing material or something jeez.
Feb. 9th, 2009 @ 12:09 am
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| » Disappointment and heartbreak |
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I think that's how you spell those words. Now after working with the mind-breaking labour that is the abstruse field of Historiography its gotten me back on that thinking train to figure out the field of academics and why I hate it so much
(Even though I can speak and write like one I find the strictures of what is essentially developing a language and exclusionary rational for the purposes of making sure you have work really shitty).
Also its gotten me an interest in defining the world around me, or also to try to get out of my robot-ish mindset, to slag people off using the internet as my medium as the British might say.
And I now see the great wonders of reading what one has previously written. That which was said previously is mostly a load of cock. One thing I am trying to reconcile at the moment is the fact that I hate people, which exists as an externally perceived notion that I have to contest (though frankly with any externally perceived notion that can be corroborated by that isn't related to a physical item is in many cases essentially true. Whether it is ultimately true becomes the real question). On further thought I can kinda see how people can see that about me, which sucks, but I would hasten to say that it stems from essentially from disappointment.
While I don't believe in many absolutes the one I like to innocently cleave to is a "human reaction scale" Basically that actions create responses which are fairly predictable. For example if I do something for someone I'd expect some sort of obligation for reciprocation at some point in the future. Or alternately if I'm treated badly for no perceived reason I will reciprocate that sentiment vociferously. This I think is the probable turning point on the affair because there is a layer of politic that has been scoured off my personality in the last years. The terrifying replacement for this milksop kindness has been a deep and abiding rage at stuff as other entries might note.
It thus comes down to a question of how to make things right. To be able to mentally put away the analysis tools of distrust and let things slide back to a virtual innocence and vulnerability. I'm just gonna set my kill counter up to 9999 for a while and tape over the reset button and see how that works out. Also I'm going to work further on idea progression and random Futurama references.
Feb. 2nd, 2009 @ 01:05 am
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| » Academia sucks. |
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Coming back into school from working in a trade is now officially wearing on me. The bullshit that one acclimatizes to claim legitimacy in the field of academia is structured in a manner I am beginning to find offensive. This I will admit is due to a mental block on my part, structure is important to enforce to allow for a framework for academics to exist in like math. The synthesis of these two thoughts however leads me to think that academia is not for me. However I still need that piece of paper to prove my worth in the general economic world, argh.
Jan. 28th, 2009 @ 05:08 pm
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| » I want to be sedated. |
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The thing that frustrates me greatly is that the internet has damaged my ability to write in long convoluted thought patterns that people at academic places. Also I've had too much caffeine and would literally be bouncing off the walls if that were possible.
Nov. 14th, 2008 @ 01:36 am
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| » (No Subject) |
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Physical Discrimination?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Northern_snakehead
Is an invasive fish species that is tasty, but looks ugly. Popular in Vietnam, and China.
Gets
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Snakehead_Terror
and
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frankenfish
movies made about how they're gonna kill all Americans by "invading"
While
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mute_swan
is also an invasive species yet they're pretty and there is no tradition of us being able to eat them, because of an old law that says they're property of the Queen of England, or their tough and greasy.
If you'll note, there is nothing in the Swan article that denotes its invasive tendencies other than the link at the bottom which says so, and links from other articles. It would seem that the Snakehead fish could be in some way exploitable for say consumptive purposes especially if it takes pressure off stuff like Cod or other species that have been over fished.
Young swans are probably tasty. Somehow the logistics of swan farming would seem to be kinda nuts, but who knows.
Anyways, the treatment of fish as "invasive" is while fairly reasonable from the life is sacred angle, seems anti-evolutionary. It'd be like disallowing immigrants from coming into countries to seek better lives, oh wait, right nevermind.
Nov. 8th, 2008 @ 11:24 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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Huh a professor said something interesting to me. In a hastily done paper for his class he remarked that I was more interested in communication rather than writing. This was a neat distinction and a nice one to describe the disjunction between what I did and what I am doing now.
I dislike having to "prove myself" to other people, but I think perhaps I've been trying to avoid the unavoidable. Life I've been coming to find is a series of proofs where we justify our existence by being awesome, or alternately by not being cocks.
Now to do some writing instead of communicating.
Nov. 6th, 2008 @ 03:08 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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Hmm, words, especially terminology could be understood to be units of thought that possesses negotiable affection. If that's the case, what does this make a person who plays with rhetoric?
Wikipedia is pretty cool sometimes. I've found a way to functionally qualify and discuss the difference between religion and philosophy. Also I got to use the word Teleology in a paper, boy I feel smart.
Nov. 2nd, 2008 @ 01:57 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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Several things that I've been pondering:
1) A British accent make you sound smarter. It does not however save trite dialogue from being extremely trite and condescending. (Heroes, Sanctuary, etc)
2) What do we understand when we understand someone? Is there a way to understand the "inner" person by knowing them? What does my composite emotional makeup look like to other people?
3) The 300 is a much better movie to represent the feel of the Iliad than Troy will ever be. The default actions of any man or god in it are Cry, Scream or Fight. Women can Cry and Scream but only in relation to Crying, unless they're gods, then they have the full range of emotions men do.
Oct. 12th, 2008 @ 08:57 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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While I languish here mildly feverish I have to ponder words one of my professors said. Being of crazy Chinese Anglican stock (sadly unrelated to other more amusing historical Hakka figures) I think there was always a sentiment of puritanical thought in the tripe that Herald spouted.
This leads to a problem I've had with university for the longest time. My thoughts centre around not what I can say as being important but what I can do as being the sole measure of my responsibility to society.
This as one can imagine is not a very helpful way of thinking when regarding the mounds of words that literati in this modern world must produce to prove their worthiness for high salaries, but having thrown off the majority of the mental harnesses that govern that thought I can say with some certainty that what I say is important, if not only for being a measure of my mind, but for the learning of rhetoric that I'm going to have to embark on these next few months as a student. Its a welcomed thought to have learned in these troubled times and something I hope that can help shape my mind and thoughts to the further strife ahead.
Oct. 10th, 2008 @ 09:49 am
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| » Funny thing |
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Just to note, Vader is the Dutch word for Father.
Oct. 8th, 2008 @ 09:03 am
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| » (No Subject) |
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Sigh, I need to learn how to concentrate and write papers better.
Oct. 6th, 2008 @ 11:06 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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First bit for those who are reading who I haven't contacted already, I'm back at school. 3 years ago I had to stop going, but now I'm back. There's a degree to finish and writing angst to suffer, yay me.
One of the things I do not miss is writing papers (In the colloquial it could be said I fucking hate them) . While I do seem like an intellectual, I rather do prefer a predominantly anti-intellectual approach to things. That being said, I don't like writing because words are the expression of self, and frankly I want people to know me by what I do, not by how I whine. This is invariably not how I present myself I think, which is an issue.
There's something to be said about identity and the people I know. I've never really worried about identity, because I am what I am. What this is, can be summed up in the phrase "Fat Chinese geek person" but is essentially a non-issue, or so I thought. A lot of the lectures the last couple of days have touched on the question of identity (also I watched that god-aweful movie that is Troy). Its got me thinking, our world is the world of patchwork titans, corporations that stride the world like giants, the sum of their corporate sponsorship. Unless you're quite mad and discover something neat or create something impossible its very unlikely for one's name to resound in the world.
All I want is the ability for the association of Me = Good guy. Doesn't happen though, cause of that whole burning hatreds that I've kept up, oh well.
Oct. 2nd, 2008 @ 03:28 am
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| » Jumper: hurm... |
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So Jumper is as Rotten Tomatoes and other critical reviews point out, fairly terrible. However as a thought, it makes an amusing allegory for the recording industry and the internet.
Maybe that's the way to continue to force people to continue to follow the Church of Standard Economic Value, engage in allegorical/memetic warfare with the outcast technology people?
Sep. 21st, 2008 @ 10:42 am
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